Sunday, February 18, 2007

MY HAIR IS TOOO SHOOOORT!!!

....why do they always end up cutting your hair a lot shorter than what they're supposed to?? now I have to say that either my head has grown or that I spilled acid on my head or I don't know what!! ....this is exactly why I tarry getting my ends trimmed....I always end up with a really really short hair cut!!
Now I am doomed to banishment :S so much for drama!! hehe

Friday, February 16, 2007

Drifting into the abstract

Ok now this is something really cool that I found on the internet and this fully describes...well...many things...

You try to see yourself, but yourself keeps slipping away. And you try to see, to grope at the truth, but you just keep on slipping away. At arms length. It’s palpable, but no. It’s tangible, but no. The only thing touchable, is the one nightstand underneath your fingers.

My head spins.
You spin. They spin. Even the speakers do.
Kinda drifting into the abstract.

You make out ho.
You without a focus.
Without care. Or concern.
And it doesn’t really matter anymore.
Decadence.
There is no me. No fucking me. There is no fucking you either. Only me. Not even. No. Not even, nor balanced. You know why. But why care? Let it float.
Borderline surfacing. Not really.
Without focus. Without care. Without coherence. Without consistence.
Wakeless. Senseless. Forbidden thoughts. Of you. Progress. It’s not on the outside anymore. Gone deep. Gone low.
Guilt.
Repentance?
No time for that.
Bla-
-bber.
Denial.
You’re not supposed to. You’re not supposed to!
Happens anyway.
Dose.
Where are you? Lost in the milky mist that’s floating inside your head along with the rest of your disposable coherence.
It comes up like a wave, like a shiver, like a gradual stinging…
Next thing you know, there are tears rolling down your cheeks. You almost wish your whole head would roll down your cheek and fall off.
Angst driven.
And so lonely.
Your choice. Really for the best?
And deep in the night you drive through the city lights. Like guiding beacons to the neon signs of the places you’ll find temporary relief. And that’s what’s it about no? Temporary relief, temporary escape, temporary oblivion. It doesn’t last and leaves you begging for the next fix. For the next sunset, for the next big party. Oh wait, correction. For the next big _temporary_ party. Well, but what is forever nowadays? Enjoy while you’re young, enjoy while you can, while you’re able. Don’t waste any chance. You never know which day’ll be your last. Like the one you’ll slice open your wrists in vain for example. You don’t mourn. You’re a fatalist, cynical. Life moves on, you’re still alive, don’t forget. Don’t forget. Don’t forget.
I don’t.
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Wednesday, February 14, 2007

On Valentines'

I can officially say that this was the my 1st non-crappy Valentine's day EVER!! yup...I didn't find it insufferable at all!! ...mainly because hanging out with friends is always a good option!! so yup, friends rule!! lol so happy friendship day (not VAlentines anymore :P )

Monday, February 12, 2007

Back to school!!

Ok,after having felt a bit confused about I don't know what and without even knowing why...maybe the fact that everything is going back to normal and some things just look as if they had never happened....but still,I finally had my 1st day of school and all I can say is:
Push back the square
Now that you need her - but you don't
So there you
go!Cause back in school
We are the leaders of it
all
So...

PS I still find it amazing the fact that I got lost in my own university....

Friday, February 09, 2007

Sensing

Intuition: The act or faculty of knowing or sensing without the use of rational processes; immediate cognition.
How much should we rely on it?? although at times it's not a question of quantity, the whole thing turns into a: do we even listen to it? do we even know we have it? I mean, sure, it's strange,but I do believe that we should listen to that 6th sense,it's gotta be there for a reason, and at times it sees beyond what we see with our eyes,so I say...give it a shot!!
And another thing is: it's amazing how your raging hormones can turn you into a borderline bipolar!!! real happy one minute,and then on the verge of tears out of nowhere!!! (I hate being extra sensitive...)
OK also....oh ye the other day was absolutely fantastic!! with the whole museum thing and then the trip to the park and the "Sphere of death" I felt like a lil girl again!! (yup,childhood memories came flooding back) and the best>worst part is that there is evidence!! but really I had an amazing time and to top it off I come home and find mail from my russian friends,seriously,how cool is that?? it doesn't get any better than that!! I can honestly say that that day was just perfect.
Something interesting too was the fact that I was a painter for 2 whole days (yup,painting everything around here) and I gotta say it's hardwork!!! my neck and my arms were just killing me after that!!
I also watched a horror movie and lived to tell about it!! yup,after having had a wonderful meal,we decided to go watch a horror film since we were all feeling already brave and well....tho I did jump and avert my gaze at times....I think that went well...lol, and I think overall,that's what I've been up to lately...oh, and also watching out so that my paranoia does not kick in. Ok,I think that's all for now.


PS dreading monday...the day of THE RETURN TO SCHOOL :o

Sunday, February 04, 2007

And the award for bad russian of the year goes to...

Ok,so I met another russian chick at the same mall I met the previous one (is there something with russian chicks and that mall???) anyways,tho this one was not as cool as the previous one,the cool thing was the fact that I got to talk to her in russian and didn't stutter or anything!! yay,one step closer to....not looking so dumb while trying to speak russian maybe?? but anyways,if things keep going this way,I'm going to be known by the entire russian-speaking community :S not that I mind course :D
What else...got a new pair of trainers today...they're hip and at the moment I'm trying to break them in :) ....what else....oh ye,I saw the same guy at the coffee shop tho this time he actually tried to get me to accept going out with him,tho he's gonna have to try a lot harder than that(I'm just not THAT easy!!)
Yesterday I went to a dancing performance of a friend of mine and it was really nice,what a way to move!! (gosh I couldn't do that in this lifetime at least!) n also....I think I've been enlightened with the whole latin-passion-secret...cool it's in the frequency!! lol
Oh ye this is a very cool pic I took:

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Lookie

Ok just how cool is this:

what does this remind you of??? of the four riders of the apocalypse that will come and destroy you during breakfast!!! and the whole pro-redhead thing makes it even better!! (yup my redhead-obsession returns)

PS can one become addicted to amaranth??cuz if so...I think I am :S

On holiday

Oh well, nothing much has been going on lately,due to the whole vacation thing, tho I should really be enjoying it cuz when I go back to school it's going to be back to the whole madness...in the meantime,I guess checking out the entire tv programming aint that bad at all,now is it? tho it can get pretty boring at times.
Lately we've been having some beautiful night skies,the whole moon shinning bright and everything,I absolutely love it,plus the smell at night,gosh it's beyond comparison!!! Ok I think I'm just rambling now but hey,it's all I am fit for at the moment.
I've also been trying to advance on some readings,and it's pretty cool to be reading a book in russian (or at least trying to, since I need to imagine at least half of the content lol, but hey I've got to get started somehow right?) and other than that...I've been having trouble with my computer since I can't seem to be able to burn some stuff out! seriously...how pathetic is the fact that a machine overpowers me?? I do not know!! ...one of these days the whole machine-revolution kinda thing is just going to take over the world!! and that seriously might happen, like today I was watching (amongst several other shows) how the whole getting a chip inserted is becoming the new ID form :S what's going to happen next?? bar codes on the back of our necks??? (tho I always thought the whole dark angel kinda thing looked rather cool).Anyway, I think now that I've gotten rid of these thoughts,I've nothing more to say at the moment...tho I'm still pretty amazed how some ppl can be unbelievably -and beyong any rational comprehension- busy!! ... is my faith in touching ppl's hearts faltering?? Oh God,I hope not!!

PS I lost my favourite-always fidgeting with- ring in the couch!! I need to start the retrieval mission to get it back!! my life just isnt complete without me playing with it at all times!!